(*) Easter Salutations
I'm going thru one of my periods of feeling lonely again. About 75% of the time I'm feeling quite comfortable and happy being single, but every now and again I really start to miss just having someone to share myself with again. Just having someone around, I guess, to appreciate and have someone to talk to and to listen - just listen. It comes and goes... I'm a very selfish individual who now appreciates his own time and space (since the divorce), so it'd be really 'interesting' if anyone came along at the moment, in that regards. But - I'm not even looking. The whole 'dating' thing is blech - I'd rather just have a good friend than having to do the whole 'dating' thing! I think that's what I miss most - having a best-friend/companion always there to talk to, be with and listen to. 10 years in that kind-of relationship is rather habit-forming, you know! lol. But I'm not rushing out seeking that again at the moment. If someone comes along, I'll be playing things very slowly - well, as slowly as a lonely bloke can survive, that is! lol. Oh gawd, I crap on...
Whilst mum's kidneys are kaput, she's doing almost well enough now for the doctors to consider evaluating her for palliative care at her own home! Gosh! ('Palliative care' simply means just keeping her comfortable until things take their final course.) We're all quite amazed that this could be even happening, as we all expected her to be dead by now - I know that sounds callous, but it's reality. Secretly, I think the hospital doesn't want her taking up their valuable bed space... I mean, it took them three days to find her a bed in the first place! Sheesh! Me? A cynic? Never!
I finally managed to arrange a time to meet with a counsellor for M and I re. a mediation get-together - but M can't make it for next Tuesday... and the counsellor-person is only available Tuesdays! Oh well... I think I'm more upset and stressed about it than I realise. That's life - but it just drains you. I feel so blah sometimes. My head is sore from banging on the wall for so long.
But at least my big toe-nail is still whole - I'm thankful for little things!
I'll be seeing the boys on Sunday - at last! It's been about three bloody weeks - three weeks TOO long for me, I'm telling you. They're enjoying themselves out on their new place... they went out on a 'paddock basher' (ie. an old bommie unregistered car) and checked out all the fences this morning. How cool is that? I check our fences here - sweeping the occasional cobweb away with a straw broom! And I sure don't need a paddock basher to do that... perhaps just a pair of ol' rubber thongs (ie. 'flip-flops' to the USA-ians! We are not so weird to wear 'rubber thongs' down here you know... well, not that I know of at least... it's getting too cold now anyhow).
Drats. I didn't mean to sound so bloody down in this post! I guess that's just how I'm feeling. I'm not really down, just a little flat. I just miss having someone to talk things thru with. Thoon is good value, but his conversational language skills are fairly limited at this stage...
On This 25th Day of March...
Died: King Faisal (Saudi Arabia, 1975).
Events: Greek Independence 1821; Good Friday - Easter.
Useless Trivia: Finster's Law: "A closed mouth gathers no feet."
My Soundtrack: Hoodoo Gurus "Ampology" CD.
Footwear: naked - or nude...? Art - or smut...?
Weather: gloriously sunny, light breeze, cloudless, low 20's.
The war from Iraq could be seen
The coalition of the willing
Found it so thrilling
But the rest of us found it obscene.
Cyalayta
Mal (ie. Mallard d'Quackers) :o)
Email: mal [@] maljam [.] cjb [.] net
Message Board: http://malboard.cjb.net